Dear Moms, have you ever felt like you’re getting angry while listening to your kids? It isn’t that “listen to them patiently as you may have many responsibilities and a busy work schedule. Hence it can be tough to keep up your relationship with the kids. Once you fail to listen to your wards, you may fAttention all moms! Have you ever experienced a moment where you felt like you…? If so, I have some exciting news for you feel like losing your temper. To overcome such a situation, the moms can do a number of things. It’s no secret that yelling at your kids can be harmful. It makes the kids feel anxious, scared, and guilty which will likely lead them not to listen to the next time around.
So what’s a better way of making the kids listen, without yelling?
- Kids have shorter attention spans than adults and are easily distracted (may be distracted by other things going on around them.)
- They don’t fully understand what you’re saying.
- Kids often don’t have the same sense of time as the adults; so they may not be doing things when you expect them to.
- They may not be aware or care about the consequences of not listening.
- Some kids simply prefer to tune out when they’re feeling overwhelmed or overexcited.
When we yell at kids, we teach them that it is apt to lose control and encourage violence. This can lead to a cycle of yelling and aggression that is difficult to control. Children who are regularly yelled at are more likely to behave aggressively among themselves.
Instead of simply reprimanding them when they misbehave, you might try encouraging them to come up with solutions on their own.
For example, “I know you’re upset, but hitting is not an acceptable way to express your anger. What can you do instead?”
This type of positive reinforcement will help children feel more capable and motivated to follow the rules.
This kind of positive reinforcement can help kids understand their expectations better and learn how they can help meet those expectations on their own.
If your child refuses to go to bed, the parent might start yelling or physically forcing her to bed.
This kind of approach can have negative impacts for several reasons.
First, it tends to make the children feel like they don’t have any control over their own life.
Second, it can cause to escalate the power struggles within and may make a child even more resistant to doing things as you want.
Instead of trying to force your kids into doing things they don’t want to do, try setting a clear target and offering choices, when possible.
For example, if a child refuses to go to bed, you might say, “I know you don’t want to go to bed yet, but it’s time for bed. You can either get into bed by yourself or I can help you.”
This way, the child feels like she has some control over the situation and is more likely to cooperate.
Here is an article that can be helpful: How to End Power Struggle With Your Pre-Schooler- Why It Happens and How to Stop It!
Another way to help encourage positive behaviour in your children is to offer choices whenever possible.
For example, if you want your child to clean up their toys but they don’t feel like doing it, you could say something like, “Do you want to do it a little at a time or all at once?”
This gives them more control and ownership over the task, which can make them more likely to do it.
It’s also important to avoid giving too many choices, as this can be overwhelming for the children.
For example, instead of asking “What do you want for dinner?” which can be overwhelming, try offering two specific choices, such as “Would you like chicken or pasta for dinner tonight?”
We may have to take some effort to follow these tips. But, if you follow these techniques, the relationship between you and your kid will be very smooth. So, adapt to the situation and be a better mom.