One of the things that amaze and hurts the believers at the same time is the image of Peter, the great fisherman, who denies his Master. No one expected anything like this from the Guru’s dear disciple. Peter did not reject the Guru out of reluctance to accept him or out of materialistic interests like Judas. Peter had a heart full of goodness, and immense respect for the Master. Peter could not stand with the Master when he had to stand on his own two feet and tongue to show his respect and love in a fine heart and confess his devotion to his Lord.
This denial was not a pre-arranged script, as Judas did. In a few moments, when frailty dominated, Peter’s weakness controlled his reputation without holding him back.
The weakness of defeating Peter is fear. Peter was afraid of others. Peter was persuaded to say he did not know because he was afraid of the leaders and the crowd. Peter could not stand alone when everyone denied Jesus. The fear of them filled in him. Peter, who was alone with them, was afraid. In the tide of that fear, Peter could not say anything substantiating his Master. Peter was afraid of circumstances. He was in a situation where he had no choice but to give up everything. A sudden feeling of loneliness. Peter was in a hurry to escape from the situation without directly overcoming it. He lost control of the situation because his heart was full of fear.
Peter must have been discouraged by the fear of persecution he might have to endure. That fear must have eliminated the words ‘I am also his disciple’ that should have spread on his tongue. Peter must have been afraid of death too. The Guru did not directly suffer insults, persecutions, and sufferings. But Peter was distracted and his attention was diverted from the Guru to the others. Is there a life-sustaining reel for him that is one of his favorites?
Could it be that we, too, are unable to follow or confess Christ in the anxieties and fears of life? Do we realize that it hurts the Guru a lot? This is not just Peter’s story, it’s ours. If we could have cried out, “I am guilty,” before pointing the finger at Peter, it would have been good for you to recall from time to time. Ways of betraying the Guru for prestige and material gain, opportunities to fearlessly deny Jesus. Let your tears fall on the eyes of the Guru who looks at you. May it be the beginning of your repentance. Then you can weep like Peter.