We cannot define the loss and grief you feel when your loved ones die. You might feel sad, angry, lost, or lonely without the person who is deceased. It can take time to adjust to what’s happened. Be patient with yourself, and lean on people you trust for support and comfort.
Here are five ideas that might help you cope when someone you love has died:
1. Join in Rituals
Being with the people who knew your loved one can be very comforting. So, the memorial services and funerals are the best times to gather. They can help people get through the first few days. They are ways to honor the person who died.
2. Accept your Emotions
If you feel to cry, do not stop once it comes. Accept the feelings you have, rather than think you “should” feel a different way. Others may not let you burst out your emotion. But you take your own time to overcome your emotions. Know that you can (and will) heal over time. Healing doesn’t mean you forget the person who died. It doesn’t mean that you miss them less.
3. Talk about it when you can
Some people want to tell the story of their loss or talk about their feelings. But sometimes people don’t feel like talking. Both are OK, too. No one should feel pressured to talk. If you do not want to talk, please do not. You might have other ways to express your emotions, you can write a memoir in a journal. Or you can write a song, poem, or make a photo tribute to your loved one. You can do this just for yourself, or you can share it with others.
4. Preserve Memories
You could do something to honor the person you love in a way that fits. Plant a tree or garden. Take part in a charity run or walk.
Make a memory box or folder that has reminders of the person who has died. Include mementos, photos, quotes, or whatever you choose. If you want, write a letter to the person. In it, you might include your feelings and things you want to say. Some people write a gratitude letter. It’s a way to thank your loved one for being a part of your life. If they encouraged good qualities in you, keep living those good qualities as a way to honor them. Love, gratitude, and meaning can help you through a difficult time.
5. Get the Support you Need
It takes time to be healed the wound that the death of your loved ones made. And it helps to have plenty of support. You can get support from family, friends, or adult mentors in your life. Grief counselors, therapists, and support groups can help, too. If you want to find more support, ask a parent, school counselor, or faith leader to help you find support that could be right for you. You can give support to others, too.